Saturday, August 30, 2008

Mr. Show

This show was fantastic Case and point.

Friday, August 22, 2008

It'll do

So I have a new guilty pleasure. Can you guess it?? It's Ghost shows. Yes thats right TV shows about ghosts, and specifically "A Haunting" on the Discovery Channel.



I don't know what it is but I just find this show so entertaining. It's probably because of the cheesy reenactments. They implore the same eerie cheesy feeling that unsolved mysteries used to do. I miss Unsolved Mysteries tremendously btw! There used to be nothing like that creepy Robert Stack scaring the shit out of me as a Young child! And if it wasn't him that left me feeling uneasy at the end of an episode I would be what happened to the drifter they featured. So heres a few possibilities:

1. He got a sex change.
2. Death by drinking too much and falling in a Ditch
3. Went Crazy.
4. Outside your house waiting to rape anything that moves!
5. White Oprah!

Although We all know that just wasn't about disappearing wierdos, it also featured ghosts, aliens, and occasionally truly investigative reporting. Observe!


Thursday, August 14, 2008

Sad but True

So my boyfriend made me watch an episode of A&E's "Intervention". Our personal favorite is Sylvia and her insane ways.This week we met Allison. Whats her addiction? you might ask well it isn't booze, pills, pot, heroin, morhpine, meth, coke, K, ecstasy, DMT, or Crack. Allison's little helper is Canned air duster.....

I didn't even know this shit could fuck people up..... Where does someone even get the urge to suck on a can I can understand pot and booze and the velvet underground made heroin cool but, Canned air what the fuck?! Ever turn one of those can upside down it shoots out an instant freezing liquid that evaporates.Oh! and watch the video the girl looks brain dead when shes on that shit. ALthough I can't help but laugh when she say's "Im walking on sunshine!"

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Even Better

I really love chelseA! i seriously get goosebumps when I watch her as White Oprah. I caught this last night and I thought it was even more genius then her first stint as W.O. Check out her clip from the season finale of living lohan. DAmn L.I. trash.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Thank god for chelsea!

Just one more reason why Chelsea and Heather are amazing!!




I hate Miley and the Jonas Brothers with a fiery passion.

Friday, August 8, 2008

Bday or Doomsday?

So today the anti-christ was born. No no no Im not talking about me. Im talking about that abomination that Gayken had with dried up cougar. Either way my birthday has been shamed even worse then last year.

Picture it! Greenpoint Two thousand and seven!

My 21st birthday at Matchelss in Greenpoint. I broke 4 glasses in an hour, had billy's cupcakes frosting on my shirt and passed out in my friends car but all without puking. Anyways I survived that night unfortunately two animals didn't. My friend moved into his new apartment that day and while we were out at the bar his dog broke into his other roommates room and snapped both there pet bunnies necks. It was tragic.

Anyways I think now that it was omen of Gayken trying to bring the apocalypse. He's just fuckin creepy.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Ms. Griffin

I love me some Kathy Griffin. Sure her voice can be a little on the irritating side but gosh darnit she's hysterical. The boy and I are going to see her live on the 10th in Canandaigua. For being on the d-list she's pulling in a good crowd actually. I've included one of my favorite segments from her stand up.




P.S. Here Mom rules she's 86 and still a firecracker!

Friday, July 25, 2008

Weeknight lover

Currently there is only one gal I'd bite the bullet for and try to be straight. She is of course chelsea Handler.



Her dry sarcastic wit, and dirty hot pocket comments is frankly what i need to get through the day sometimes. Also her panel is pretty good consistently. Check out this lil sketch making fun of white Oprah and her other talentless daughter, you know the one!

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Penis Plant

So for some reason today I decided to start looking up the worlds largest flowers. It probably has everything to do with the video game hes playing. So anyways I was reading up on the biggest flower also known as the corpse flower or titan arum, because of its offensive smell. They say it smells like rotting flesh but I'd guess its more like star jones old vajayjay!



So this is the said plant, As I was reading up on it i couldn't help but notice this tid bit The titan arum or Amorphophallus titanum (from Ancient Greek amorphos, "without form, misshapen" + phallos, "penis", and titan, "giant") . In short its a big old smelly dick!

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Gay

So this past weekend was Rochester's pride weekend. In brief I worked most of it away but I did manage to make it to the parade. And since my bf and his friends are such bitches we stationed ourselves near the protesters.

Honest to good they were the real show since the roc parade is missing drag queens endlessly trapped in a k-hole. How hate mongering religious zealots does it take to make a proper sign. The answer is way more then you think. The one protester didnt even have a proper sign having to do with gays and there perverted ways as they put it. Anywho the one persons sign read "Star Wars is occultism" and on the other side it read "Hillary should be home doing the dishes" Either one is baffling. My boyfriend told the boys mother if thats her view that she shoulkd get her fat ass back in the kitchen. To my suprise none of these people had a college degree and claimed earthly education doesn't matter for the lord.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Just Becuz

For those who don't know Im obsessed with the show American Dad! I find everything about it to be a delight. Heres a clip that reminds why i love the show and also reminds me of the kind of world we live in. Oh Iran Contra!

Friday, July 11, 2008

Delivery Tales

A new segment i will be featuring is delivery tales. For those who don't know my part time job right now is delivering mexican food. In the past few months I have had some interesting experiences believe you me! Also Rochester has worse drivers then queens.

My first goes to that women whose across main street. This happened about a week or two ago and I almost cried it was so hysterical. For those who don't know main street is an interesting area, you know interesting people (crackheads, families, DMT, meth addicts). Anyways I show up and a relatively frumpy women is already waiting. Now her deck is being worked on and there was a wood beam between us that she used as a counter. I give her food and she proceeds into the recesses of the house to sign the credit slip. Moments later she exits cocks her head in the back in the air and hands me slip to say "I'd like my copy and my receipt" The bitch was just holding them. I gave them to her to see that she has not tipped and so I walk off. Approaching my car I look down on the grass in front of her house to see a bloody tampon. EWWWWWWWWWW! the bitch just acted like she was royalty and she's got dirty feminine hygiene products on her lawn. I got into my car and pulled down the street I was laughing so hard I almost crashed into a curb. The wonder that is rochester.

VH1

After viewing the highly controversial of boondocks. You know the one where BET is trying to destroy black people, of course not it didn't air in america only Canada. Anyways basically Aaron Mcgrudder theorizes that BET is out to make bad tv to bring down the african american community. Whether he's right or wrong is up to dispute. But if BET is out to destory black people then VH1 is out to destroy people in general. Recently the network has really taken a turn to with its most heanus venture yet, I love money!

For those who have not heard they've rounded up all the rejects, Tranny messes and sex workers they could from past reality dating ventures such as "Rock of love", "I love New York" and "Who wants to date a crackhead". The contestants are going to be pitted against each other until one is left who will then win $250,000. The contestants are possibly the best of the celebreality universe that VH1 has created.The show will most likely be so trashy I will have no choice to watch in disgust. Below is the porn star that is in the current cast.



At time like this Im reminded of the film and novel Battle Royale. In which a class of japanese kids is put on island with explosive collars around there neck and are forced to kill each other until one is left standing. WHY CAN'T THEY MAKE THEM DO THAT!!!!!!!!!


Weekly Inspiration

As with my return to ze blog they'll be fun posts such as this.

This weeks and the first is the wonderful Joanna Lumley. Or as most of us know her as Patsy Stone on Ab Fab. I love her to death I remember when they had just the 3 seasons on comedy central when i was kid. I was hooked my family should of just known at a young age that i'd turn out gay. Anyways Joanna was also a bond girl in her majesty secret service. She was quite the hottie back in her day and she still is now. Also my boy and I might be Eddie and Patsy for hallowen. Heres a two clips of PAtsy at her best because one just isn't enough:



M.I.A

After a long hiatus Im back.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

OH Viacom.

VH1 has a new slogan Watch and Discuss. Lets face it we all know it should be Watch in Disgust. Its the only feeling I get when watching flavor of love or rock of love or any of there evil reality tv.

Friday, February 15, 2008

He's a Big MO

I was out making deliveries this morning my job as a burrito delivery boy. (It's alot less sexy then it sounds believe me). I had just started making my rounds yet was paused by the fact that I was out of smokes. So I pulled into my friendly neighborhood rite aid after getting stiffed a tip and 37 cents for one of the deliveries. I was rather glum until I feasted my eyes on this.




ALL I CAN SAY IS WOW!!!! I almost burst out laughing, and for once it wasn't beause there was a crack head working there.I just can't believe the words Dale Jr. and Big Mo all on a fat ass candy bar. He must be a chubby chaser. I just can't believe not one red flag went off in the marketing room. But then again I doubt there'd be many fags working on a nascar star based candy.

This might be the gayest candy bar since the whatchamacallit.