Today I ventured out into the depths of westbury, ny with a friend of the straight persuasion to help him pick out a gift for his loverly lady. So of course we had no choice but to go the mall. Now I hate the mall usually its hard to get me to go into one ,especially on Long island. Though it is one of the premier places to people watch in tristate area.
A mall on long island for those who haven't experienced is a delicate balance, its actually quite amazing how the whole thing doesn't turn into a powder keg. First you have your largest group women. I got nothing against girls but when faced with shiny objects they succumb to there power. The next is the guido's probably the most obnoxious of the group, they usually have one or two girls on there arms and a thin crust of cocaine around the nostrils easily made noticeable due to a bad fake tan (Misty tan love), There girlfriends two are no winners either usually more coked up and uppity. Then you have ur mall rats which are declinging day by day unfortunately due to low income housing behind a closer mall. After that its annoying high schoolers which even at the age of 20 make you ask "was I this fuckin annoying" Oh and gays but we are mostly in hiding on the LI at the mall.
Anyway the shopping experience was a success I tlked my friend between the right choices for his lil lady. Apparently women will buy anything my friends gf originally wanted one of the most wretched bags I'd had ever seen. SO ig uided him away for this and had him opt for this watch she wanted.
In the end I bought some fine keihls products and red jeans.